Fourteen years

there’s something about the tinge of early 80s photos

July 10 marked fourteen years that Dad is gone.

Sometimes it feels like fourteen minutes because much of that day is so vivid. I was dreading this year because I learned a few years ago that I need structure to make the day better. Work is better than taking off, tourism conferences and soccer parades are the best. Alas neither of those were in the cards this year and I was really concerned that a work from home day might not be busy enough.

an amazing friend meeting me at 6:30

I knew that I wanted to run for sure as I swear running is like human zoomies. I’m way more productive if I burn off some energy in the morning, and I wanted to honor Dad in the miles. He wasn’t a runner, but he was at every one of Jordan’s and my soccer, softball, baseball games and track meets. I wasn’t sure what mileage I wanted to do. I knew 8.1 (he’d have turned 81 in February) was off the table distance wise and splitting up into a morning and afternoon 4 wasn’t possible due to Tropical Storm Fay. Knew 7.1 could be doable with walking, but didn’t really want to mark him with his anniversary date. 2.3 (he was born on February 3) seemed too little, but them I hit on his birthdate. I’d run 2.3 and 3.9.

no flutterbies yet

It was a run/walk with many stops by butterfly gardens and a stop to check out the turtles, but it was exactly what I needed. Grateful to friends who were willing to come out and run so early and everyone who checked in on me during the day or left a note. Can say without a doubt you’d have loved him.

And somewhere in the 3.9 segment I did some math and realized this would total 10K. My longest pain free run since December. Thanks, Dad.

Nothing spectacular in the rest of the week. I feel like I’ve found my summer normal. Linking up with Kim and Deborah for the weekly run down:

no more boring toes!
  • never miss a Monday: I called this Mondaze on Strava, and it was true. Overcast, humid which was the story of the week, but the run did feature an artichoke thistle, which I’ve never before noticed in the park. Day ended very well though as I took advantage of Phase 3 and got a pedicure. My salon has plexiglass between each chair and I felt totally safe. Manicure tables are set up with a three sided plexiglass block around the tech, but I’m not a huge manicure person so didn’t get one. Glad to have hot & spicy toes, as I wanted a fun color.
  • Tuesday: I think I went for a walk. I don’t remember.
  • wring me out Wednesday: I called it good at 5K. It was gross even early and I was zapped.
  • Thursday: a beautiful morning for a walk. Even with some of the social distancing restrictions relaxed, it’s still very easy to have a quiet morning in the Park. Nice to have a view from the other side of Turtle Pond too.
  • Friday: besides honoring Dad, this run turned into a nice training run for Kim’s Bix virtual race. Am I training for a virtual? No. Not at all. But the plan once I got to five miles pain free was to walk to and from a five mile loop, which seemed doable. But after accidentally run/walking 10K I knew it meant I could very likely run/walk seven miles. I’m not going to push it at all as my only goal is staying pain free, but this was a pleasant surprise.
Hi Mr. Cloud
  • Saturday: I needed a mental and physical day off and mother nature provided an excellent incentive with on and off thunderstorms. I didn’t leave the apartment until 6, and was rewarded with this rainbow when I did. Needless to say, I got wet on the way home.
you’d think this sign would mean they’re on. No
  • Sunday: I dawdled, and as a result it was a plod when I finally got out to run. I usually hate that word, but it fit what I did. I had Science in Sport in my water bottle but I only had the 20 oz with me. I need to start running with a hydration belt again for extra water when I don’t run Central Park. I hope they do turn these on soon though. I came home to shower and charge gadgets, and the river breeze is calling me. Have to finish a book before the new Daniel Silva comes out this week. Bookworm problems!

26 thoughts on “Fourteen years”

  • I can’t imagine how hard the anniversary of his passing must have been, especially this year. I’m glad that you had a friend to meet you for a run and that you were able to honor him that way. I can guarantee he is so proud of you.

    • Aww thank you. I think/hope he is too. Still so grateful I flew home and surprised him for what turned out to be his last birthday.
      Was glad the anniversary fell at a time where we could have some togetherness. It would have been impossible earlier.

  • What a nice way to honor your dad’s memory! You look like him too!

    How fun to get a pedicure! It really is the little things, isn’t it? And when you look down at your toes, you’ll smile…

    • I look so much like both of my grandmothers it’s amazing. I’ll have to post a pic of Nana (dad’s mom). Carleo face is a thing.
      Boring toes are not OK

  • Glad that you navigated 14 without a meltdown. So hard to lose them that young. I imagine, anyway, obviously mine were/are quite long lived. But it wasn’t pretty for a long time for my Dad, and it sounds like your Dad packed a lot of living into a short time. Still, hugs.

    Sound like you were strong this week! The weather has definitely been obnoxious. Here’s to a better week this week!

    • Dad was very sudden, but we got sixteen (lymphoma) /ten (first heart attack) bonus years with him and as hard as sudden was, he got to see us grow up. Having watched slow with grandma, I’m glad we didn’t have that with dad. It was harder in so many ways.

      Yes, weather at least looks more reasonable.

  • What a thoughtful way to honor your dad. People always say that as time goes by it gets easier but I am not so sure. I am not sure if I “knew you” when my younger sister passed away 2 1/2 years ago very suddenly. I never really know how to honor her either. Life is short and we have to appreciate every day we have with each other. Anyway…nice job on those longer pain free runs!

    • I can’t even imagine that pain. **HUGS**
      It would have been right before I joined the linkup -Coco found me in the cherry blossom blogs and then it took me a bit to fully join. It took me longer to follow folks on social media, but I don’t remember knowing this.
      I think we honor them and their memories by continuing to be good people. xxx

  • I love how you honored your father (and I’m sure he did, too). Hugs to you, Cari. I love your pretty toes! I’m so glad that 10K went so well…the Bix-7 will be easy-peasy (well, sort of LOL). Enjoy your week 😉

    • Thank you. He also would have appreciated the coffee cakes for breakfast that followed the run.

      Best thing about this (besides of course our photo silliness?) is that I can do it on the 10K “course” I did last week which is super flat. And I have the alternate of the river which can get me about 10K if it’s a scorcher. Much better than the August 7m here which I did once and then vowed not to ever again until they moved it to February. We’re going to have so much fun.

  • I’m glad you figured out a good way to honor your Dad. It sounds like he was a wonderful father and that you had a very close relationship. <3 I do love your toes. I also like the sound of your nail salon’s set-up — I’d be comfortable with that too. I had to do my own for the wedding, but when it’s time for a fresh coat I hope I can let the professionals do it!

    • He was a very good man. Not that we were spoiled – we weren’t, but I truly don’t remember him saying no to anything Jordan or I wanted to do. Best laugh I had was when they picked me up at the airport with twin buzz cuts. Even having regrown his hair from chemo, he wasn’t saying no.

      I’ve always felt my salon went above and beyond the nail hygeine regulations so trusted them to do this right too. The only kind of bottle neck is the drying machines near the entrance, but they’ll figure that out. and with masks required and people facing in different directions I don’t think it’s as risky as say side by side pedi chairs

  • That is such a pretty color for your pedicure. I would love to get one too but waiting for the right time. Not sure when that will be.

    I am glad you were able to honor your dad. Mine died when I was 19 so it was a long time ago. I was not close to him and don’t remember too much about him. I do love that picture of the both of you. Hugs to you.

    • Thank you!
      I was 26 and very lucky that we were close. Not a month before he passed he came to pick me up off a redeye as I had no idea how to get home from the airport as I hadn’t lived there FT since I was 17.

      The right time is a hard concept. I haven’t gotten my haircut in part because that might be too close to my face for my personal safety.

  • What a nice way to honor your dad’s memory. I’m sure it was a hard day for you and I’m glad you could plan how to get yourself through it.
    I haven’t had a pedicure since last fall. My feet could really use it but then again I’m not seeing anyone so I’m kind of like, why bother?

    • you’re why bother is me and my roots. I won’t be able to get away with this when we go back to the “real world” so why not now. I missed painted toes, bbut I think they enjoyed the breather.
      Thank yoU!

  • I was glad that I was able to check in with you and also oh my goodness that storm cloud! Lots of love to you, of course. And some good solid running and walking (I also forgot what I did but for me, it was on Wednesday, apart from it was damp and I enjoyed some sort of a run!)

  • Virtual HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!! Your dad died so young.

    Glad you are running pain-free. That’s so great. I got my nails done and it felt so nice!!

    My foot is hurts and am deciding when to give in and get another shot. Or just try a new pair of shoes.

    Your guess on which one I chose this week lol

    • Very young. I wish he’d met Jordan’s kids. Kate’s mom and he died within weeks of each other. Personally, 2006 was worse than 2020 in some ways. Sending good thoughts to your tootsies. xx

  • Sending so much love to you <3. I just can't imagine. I love all the ways you honored and remembered your Dad this week. What a beautiful tribute.

  • I’m glad you had running friends to help you make it through your tough day. Your dad sounded wonderful! Sending more hugs and love your way! My dad was my biggest running supporter as well. Even though he never saw me run a race in high school (hello dairy farmer’s hours) or afterward, he always wanted to hear all about it. October 20th with be 7 years…

    • Hugs to you in advance of October. I always love when you share his stories and that letter.
      Dad was a civil servant in the career he had when we were around (Catholic priest before that) so he was able to see a number of our games due to his predictable hours and bus schedule. Thank you!

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